Sweeter than a candy bar

Courtesy of Harold and Kumar:

I’m sure that I will always be
A lonely number like root three

The three is all that’s good and right,
Why must my three keep out of sight
Beneath the vicious square root sign,
I wish instead I were a nine

For nine could thwart this evil trick,
with just some quick arithmetic

I know I’ll never see the sun, as 1.7321
Such is my reality, a sad irrationality

When hah! What is this I see,
Another square root of a three

As quietly co-waltzing by,
Together now we multiply
To form a number we prefer,
Rejoicing as an integer

We break free from our mortal bonds
With the wave of magic wands

Our square root signs become unglued
Your love for me has been renewed

mmm...ahhhh...haaaaa

Sorry to disappoint u all with the misleading title XD

I'm extremely apologetic to my dear blog to whom I have been indifferent recently. But really, there will always come a time when there are more interesting things to do, so i don't really care =P Recently, I've been fixated on my computer for almost the entire day watching the seemingly endless episodes of Friends, and at the same time learning a thing or two about humor, only to realise that those lines aren't exactly applicable in real life situations, with the exception of really close friends who are of the same frequency, or a couple happily attached. I don't suppose when you happen to buy a drink and ask your friends whether they'd like one, only to be overwhelmed by the amount of requests, you'd say 'okay okay i was just being polite' casually. XD that would shatter even the cold-hearted. Nevertheless, there could never be another comedy series that tickled my funny bone so much my stomach actually hurts after an hour or so. I regret not buying the complete series earlier, but better late than never =)'better safe than sorry' doesn't really apply here dudes.

It is somewhat heartwarming that the number of philanthropists is proportionate to the increasing number of millionaires in modern day. An example would be the ever gracious bill gates who will not hesitate to help the needy given the riches at his disposal. 0.1% of his wealth in notes could kill even the strongest man alive. Yet, that is not why i brought up this issue. Philanthropists are usually portrayed as generous and sincere people...but(here we go)i bet every dime i have that it's just an ostensible act to conceal the relatively more unsightly ones. If that's not the issue, then they're just putting up a facade to raise their respectability (yes...some ppl can't earn it, so they buy it). Until today, there has never been a philanthropist who donated half or more of his wealth to charity, so herein lies the 'I can help you get richer, healthier and stronger, but I'll never let you rise beyond myself' kind of mentality that i assume MOST of us possess. And when the recipients are eventually emancipated from former disasters and could potentially pose a threat, the giving ceases. It is akin to learning Kungfu from a Jackie Chan. I'm sure he'll teach all the basics, but he definitely wouldn't teach you to kick the other guy in the man balls if you were losing because that's he's ultimate under-the-belt move and you'd win fights hands down all the time. Still, let's not discount the fact that there remains a glimmer of hope that regular people actually care about others as can be seen from various charitable activities going on in poverty stricken areas like zimbabwe and east timor. Haha so now we can only hope, that somehow hoping to change our ways will change our ways in the midst of hopelessness. Remember, Jackie Chan...MAN BALLS! Likely? U decide...

Confession: Father I have sinned, I lied about the betting.

Quote: 'Free thinker' is just a camouflage for the non-believer.

'I'm sorry?'

No offense to my catholic friends, but why is the Pope going around the world apologising for child molesters, gay priests and rapists? Not that he's helping in anyway to alleviate the victims' troubles. Sure, we are all far from perfection, and most deserve a second chance, yet if a mere apology heals all, then police forces will not be necessary, crime would be rampant, but all is jolly with a meager 'sorry'. In my eyes, the pope is not above mortal men, and should not be acting as though he is. Let the criminals pay for their sins, and pay dearly.

hehehe

Ching Chong Chinaman couldn't sit,
Ching Chong Chinaman couldn't sleep;
Ching Chong Chinaman milked a cow,
But Ching Chong Chinaman squeezed the wrong tits,
And ended with his face full of shit.

It's a thrill to see egos speaking, esp when they did squeeze the wrong tits, metaphorically speaking of course. I feel your pain, Chingy, but do you get my drift?

Regards,
My Ego.

Sample of A Resignation Letter

This is a sample letter of resignation from an employee of a computer firm:

Dear Mr. Ding,
As an employee of an institution of higher education, I have a few very basic expectations. Chief among these is that my direct superiors have intellect that ranges above the common ground squirrel. After your consistent and annoying harassment of my co-workers and myself during the commission of our duties, I can only surmise that you are one of the few true genetic wastes of our time.

Asking me, a network administrator, to explain every little nuance of everything i do each time you happen to stroll into my office is not only a waste of time, but also a waste of precious oxygen. I was hired because i know how to network computer systems, and you were apparently hired to provide amusement to myself and other employees, who watched you vainly attempt to understand the concept of 'cut and paste' for the hundredth time. You will never understand computers, Something as incredibly simple as binary still gives you too many options. You will also never understand why people hate you, but I am going to try to explain it to you, even though i am sure this will be just as effective as telling you what an IP is. Your shiny new iMac has more personality than you ever will have.

You walk around the building all day, shiftlessly looking for fault in others. You have a sharp-dressed useless look about you that may have worked for you interview, but now that you actually have responsibility, you pawn it off on overworked staff, hoping their talent will cover got your glaring ineptitude. In a world of managerial evolution, you are the blue-green algae that everyone else eats and laughs at. Managers like you are a sad proof of the Dilbert principle. Seeing as this situation is unlikely to change without you getting a full frontal lobotomy reversal, I am forced to tender my resignation. However, I have a few parting thoughts.

1. When someone calls you in reference to employment, it is illegal for you to give me a bad recommendation. The most you can say to hurt me is 'I prefer not to comment.' I will have friends randomly call you over the next couple of years to keep you honest, because i know you would be unable to do it on your own.

2. I have all the passwords to every account on the system, and I will know every password you have used for the last five years. If u decide to get cute, I am going to publish your 'favourite list' which i conveniently saved when you conveniently made me 'back up' your useless files. I do believe that terms like 'Lolita' are not usually viewed favourably by the administration.

3. When you borrowed the digital camera to 'take pictures of your mother's birthday', you neglected to mention that you were going to take pictures of yourself in the mirror nude. Then you forgot to erase them like the techno-moron you really are. Suffice to say, I have never seen such odd acts with a sauce bottle, but i assure you that those have been copied and kept in safe places pending authoring of a glowing letter of recommendation. (Try to use a spell check please; i hate having to correct your mistakes.)

Thank you for your time, and i expect the letter of recommendation on my desk by 800am tomorrow. One word of this to anybody, and all your little twisted repugnant obsessions will be open to the public. Never fool with your systems administrator. Why? Because they know what you do with all that free time!

Wishing you a grand and glorious day,
Sukhdeep M.B

--end--



note: don't u just love first names?

Untitled(Episode 2)

'Yesterday's dinner was sumptuous, today's was simply scrumptious. Maybe my mother should consider setting up her very own cina cuisine. For that, and many other reasons, she'll always be someone dear to me.' Therefore we should all appreciate the love and lessons that all mothers have selflessly showered upon us; we should embrace them with our love and be their living legacy; and we definitely SHOULD stop preaching ideals that we think are pertinent to others' lives, be it now or the future, for the simple reason that it just isn't our business to do so.

As much i find some blogs reflective of perceptive individuals, I scowl at the writings of the shallow, despise the naivete of the childish and resent the implication that i might one day have to deal with these people whether i like it or not. The world is already overwhelmed by skeptics, and I don't need any more of them to doubt me. Oh yes, back to the main point about blogging, I like personal posts, but affinity for the writer's character is not a necessity. We all love to throw around big words like 'honour' 'promise' 'love' 'responsibility' and many more of similar nature, because they make us look good. People profess to love their mothers on mother's day, but why accumulate all that love for just one day when one can love them everyday; that is of course, if one really loves them. If one feels guilty of being involved in a charitable cause, because one knows that he doesn't really care about god forsaken people, then spare others the agony of having to work with one's sorry ass, and after that...please, shut that trap up =). That's not all, they slate their friends' for expressing opinions about certain issues and challenge others to transcend when they are incapable of such feats. They lampoon others for actions that they consider unethical. Seriously, who the hell do these people think they are? What's more ludicrous is that all too often, these self righteous people are the very perpetrators of the acts which they deem sordid. Suck it up, biatch(s)!

On a lighter note, i went to my buddy's cookout several days ago and completely enjoyed myself. It wasn't just the delectable food that excited me, but also the company that really got me ticking. Oh, i also found a new friend there(he's actually my buddy's nephew), and he's so adorable!

Yao Han meets Justin

If i have a kid next time, i would want him to be as cute as yao han. Damn, that'll mean that he can only get his looks from his mom. I'm hopeless.

U da man!

The battle to survive is ceaseless for all living beings, of course with the exception of those who have already departed. Then again, maybe the fight for survival resumes again in the afterworld, no one can be sure. Anyway yea, every single one of us are in built with the instinct to survive, even adorable little aquatic pets that have been condemned to life in a four sided tank, and it's certainly not because fishes and fish tanks signed a contract that stipulates 'till death do we part'. Man, and the lives we are willing to sacrifice for selfish reasons.

During the last few days, my three aquatic darlings have contracted a tail rotting disease as a result of my procrastination in not washing the tank frequently enough. At first i stared at their wounds in disbelief, thinking that a cat, bird or monkey could have been the culprit (people never seem to ascribe blame to themselves, but what are fingers for then?), so i separated out the one with the most wounds into a tank with clean filtered water and silently thought about how i should assassinate the culprit. Miraculously, Mr. fish no.1 recovered in a day and was swimming naturally, the only setback was that the tail never quite grew back just yet. Still, i was happy enough. Then as i looked up at the big tank, my heart sank, Mr. Fish no.2 was floating motionlessly on the water. Damn. I tried to perform cpr on him, but his eyes were pearl white and i just knew he was long gone. =( fishes come and go, but memories last forever?



okay Ms. Fish no.3 had the big tank all to herself for two whole days. She seemed satisfied to have things the way they were until...white discharge was all over her luscious body and she swam with a limp. It spelt disaster. I relocated her to another tank of clean water, added a few drops and medication and pinches of salt. Today, she looked well, but like Mr. Fish no.1 , her tail was slightly disfigured. Hopefully, they will pull through this catastrophic period. Still, I salute their will to live and passion to successfully recover. Maybe we all can learn a thing or two from pets too, well just don't wait till your ass starts rotting before scrambling for cure. Preemptive action makes a world of difference, but we never seem to learn, do we?

Pics of my warriors =)

Ms. Fish no.3


Mr. Fish no.1


Little warriors

Potential! Can't u tell?

This is how you shower love on your stomach

Hello Dinner!

Hello Dinner, again!

and again!

having the weekday blues

Life is always such a moron when u least expect it to be, especially when there's nothing much to do, and your mind runs wild like a convict who escaped from prison. I realised there is more to life than winning or losing: to win gracefully, to win like a loser, to lose like a winner and to lose ingloriously. Though it is a mere extension of the well known 'win or lose' concept, we often fail to realize them and let the end justify our means. More often than not, when we win at the expense of others, we feel proud of ourselves. Outrageous i say! But that is the way of life, and that's how we're supposed to live it. Because if we do not conform to these social rules, the only thing we stand to lose is our self worth, dignity and pride. Not so surprisingly, the three most valuable values to us are usually the root of our problems, because we are often too proud to give in, too weak to resist and too blind to see.

On another note, I am displeased by people who do not respond promptly, be it in virtual, or face-to-face communication. Like it or not, it only reflects the friendship hierarchy with glaring clarity. The later people respond, the less important their friends are in their social circle. In the event where you are occupied with something, at least have the courtesy of informing, and not take others for granted. If there is a legitimate reason for not being able to reply, fair enough, then let the other person know, I'm sure we'd all understand. Imagine having been treated the same way for lengthy periods of time, and suddenly having a favor being asked of you by that friend who neglected you. Having second thoughts about helping? Good, it shows you're human too. So, you claim to be busy, but what's the big deal anyway? Isn't there always a tomorrow? Any relationship is a two way exchange, and if there seems to be only one way traffic, then its not worth cherishing, much less having at all.

So.......

Blissful Marriage

A couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies.

So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."
"Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face. I'm going to have a beer."
The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?"

She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc

The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was,

"Yes, Lollipop...but at the bar...you know...they have frozen glasses... "

He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?" She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious...I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"

"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie h?" She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and pork strips.

"But my sweet honey...at the bar....you know there's swearing, dirty words and all that..."
"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? ....

"LISTEN UP D*CKHEAD! SIT DOWN, SHUT THE F*CK UP, DRINK YOUR DAMN BEER IN YOUR DAMN FROZEN MUG, AND EAT YOUR F*CKIN' HORS D'OEUVRES. BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING TO A F*CKIN' BAR! THAT SH*IT IS OVER...GOT IT, AS*HOLE?"

And, they lived happily ever after.

P.S: thank u Karina!

A day well spent

Yesterday was one of the most hectic days of my seemingly interminable holiday: Had my visa done and then went out with a good friend from primary sch days. She was as lovely as always, and I, drab as usual. It was 3 whole years since we last met, thankfully we still have some chemistry. I spent half the time entertaining myself rather than her, and realised how much i sucked at foosball(or is it fusball furryballs) and pool. It was embarassing how badly I played, but that was about all that was unpleasant. Clean cool fun was the name of the game and i really enjoyed most of it, especially the mocking part. XD

Anyway, I forgot to mention that I had to deal with two faggots in one day. One while applying for visa, and the other who managed a cosmetic shop. I can just imagine them singing in the shower everyday at the top of their voices, using the showerheads as their microphones, going 'I'm NOT a MAN, not YET a WOMAN... All I need is time, to find a hole that's mine...' and so the story goes(don't u love britney spears for giving me the idea). Freaks of nature. Even if there are only 2 men(me and some random guy) left in the world, I wouldn't even think of touching the other guy. YUCK. Piss off homos!

cheapskate noobs

Tokyo Drift was a very unique movie. Cars were made to do majestic maneuvers that are humanly impossible with ordinary cars. The cars were stylish, fleet and heavily accessorised. Spoilers, bumpers, rev-ed up engines, drift tyres and multicolored headlights were aptly fitted onto cars to give a new definition for coolness. Form an image of this car in your mind's eye. Beautiful, isn't it?

Obsession of this mental image is so palpable that it has become somewhat endemic. Car freaks start to modify their cars as they please, having no regard for the original designs that car engineers tireless created with the consideration of airflow, resistance and limit. I have no issues with people who do have the technical know-how of car enhancement, but I detest people who do not. Its actually one of the reasons why I fume with disgust so often whenever i drive. In every 10 cars, I could find at least 1 car which has a modified exhaust pipe- and it's not like exhaust pipes enable cars to travel at higher speeds- and the driver of which is a too-cool-to-be-true punk who loves stamping on the accelerator to make the oh so irritating 'VROOOMMM'. I hate to disappoint anyone, but these cars aren't usually anything like what we see in the movies. The most common model on the roads these days are the Gen-2s(made in msia) and they'll look something like this:



It couldn't get anymore aesthetically pleasing to the eye, could it? Actually, i wonder what were spoilers made for? My bro once remarked that it looked more like a flimsy Japanese table, which made me wonder how professional carmakers would ridicule these car owners. Still, i'm not ruling out the possibility that my judgment is porous because it could my lack in depth of automobile technical knowledge that in hindering my comprehension of modern style. ahhh, but I still am adamant that owners of low end cars should not be drawn into the hype about car modification. In this world, one has to live within his means, and though they might feel that they can afford such luxuries, the bottom line should be whether the money was well spent. If you can't afford it, don't force it, what's the big deal anyway. Today, trying too hard is a sin itself. Forgive me if i seem to be implying stereotypical idea that only low income earners drive less expensive cars, but what really is the probability of a kancil owner being a millionaire? I doubt wealthy people would put good money into bad investments like that. But who knows right? In order to satiate your curiosity about car owners with grotesque taste, here goes:




Another random thought: whenever people get involved in road accidents, there is bound to be some form of altercation no matter which party was clearly at fault. Both parties would be in a state of denial with the belief that they cannot possibly be the cause of the accident, much less the sole cause of the accident. Then, like elementary school kids, they play the blame game. Maturity does reinvent childishness. The sight of them bickering brings back memories of youth, which I savour with utmost pleasure. =)

Untitled (episode 1)

Oh what a cliched word to use for a title. But hey, some ppl couldn't even be bothered to name their posts, so i guess I'm not that lacking in inspiration...The raison d'etre of...aghh screw it. The only reason that i am blogging now is that i fear for my own sanity. Having so many mind boggling questions that keep harassing the insides on my brain is not helping. Yes, and those very thoughts are turning against me as I backstab them on my virtual journal.

Money matters. There are many ways to interpret those two words. 'Which is it?' u may ask, money issues or that money is important? Both. The world revolves around money, ie money rules the world. I can't think of a single thing that doesn't involve the use of money, except for happiness in tropical jungles(still, the day will come when u'd had to pay off with something of value- presumably money- to logging companies so as to prevent them from literally bringing the house down), hence it only serves to substantiate my point that money is everything. Sometimes i find life intolerable, not because i'm neurotic or overly compulsive; rather, i feel that what the life cycle repeats itself so very lifelessly that i find myself bubbling with boredom rather than with excitement. What we have been learning, or are being forced to learn, is the corollary of our parents(and their parents and so on) being indoctrinated with the principle that money IS king while everything else is secondary. What happened to all the talk about happiness being of perennial importance? Ultimately, we want to be successful in whatever monetary endeavours we might take up in the future. Why? Because our undying passion and insatiable hunger for knowledge? Maybe. Lets not discount people who are truly dedicated to their interests rather than the paychecks that come with the job, but for the vast majority, do u think they REALLY give a shit?

What i'm trying to put forth here is something that the eager and ambitious young of today have overlooked time and again with the cost of time for short term gains. That's why we all will encounter grouchy colleagues and maniacal bosses at some point. I know people just can't seem to learn from history, but this really isn't a historical text. note to self: don't make that same mistake!

Poisonous thoughts

We all live in the native land of the hypocrite. As a result of which, we practise not what we preach, but as we see fit. Try recalling the time you consoled someone who was shattered in heart and crushed in soul to take a different outlook in life but not being able to do the same when you experienced the same sensations. Then try again to picture a funeral where one of the deceased's close friend will tell the loved ones of the dead 'if there's anything i can do for you, anything at all, just let me know.' and think whether these people really mean it. Alternatively, have u asked someone whether he/she is okay, but never really gave a damn regardless of the answer the person might give? Yes, that is what savaged beings we all are, and in denial we nourish these evils within and debauch our own soul. To justify our vanity, we kill; to uphold our pride, we hurt others; to save ourselves from destruction, we sin. Such is the egocentricity of man the we will die in our own hands eventually. Yet after all, what did it matter to one? One’s days were too brief to take the burden of another’s errors on one’s shoulders. Each man lived his own life, and paid his own price for living it. The only pity was one had to pay so often for a single fault. One had to pay over and over again, indeed. In her dealings with man, Destiny never closed her accounts.

To many, moderation is a fatal thing. Enough is as bad as a meal. More than enough is as good as a feast. We all live with and in extremes. For instance, there are some whose hearts are inundated with pride, some devoid of pride, but few or none are able to strike the right balance of ego and frailty. Thus we bleed easily, and turn to graver sins to relieve ourselves. When the monstrousity of pain is no longer bearable, people drink excessively, drug themselves and in some cases, commit suicide. 'To cure the soul by means of the senses, and the senses by means of the soul.'(Oscar Wilde ), that is what they try to do, but fail others in doing so.

After all that is said, i guess it is best to remain ignorant as knowledge would be fatal. It is the uncertainty that charms one. Mist makes things wonderful, as life would only be a dream from which one never awakens.

Patriotism =)

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Whenever people see signs like the one above, they are not supposed to be puffing away in the vicinity. Wait, I'm being insensitive here, I have neglected to cater to the needs of the illiterate. My bad, I'll make it up by posting another picture.



Is that better? It should be, else I out of ideas. Learn ABC? In my country, where the grass is green and the people are mean, u'd catch sight of many uncivil acts if u observed carefully. People don't bother holding doors even though they know that someone else is right behind them. They spit all over the place as if the ground was water is worthless. When qualified drivers see yellow on traffic lights, they interpret it as a sign to accelerate even faster. Best of all, people nowadays don't seem to be able to read universal signs, much less care about respecting the rules signs represent. I'm not talking about conforming to normalcy, neither am i referring to the global gesture we all know(if u don't know this, u're worse than a baby). Yea up yours!



So I digressed. Smoking is not a form of transgression. The justice system does not see the necessity of punishing people who want to die a slow death. In fact, I would not give a damn if smokers did not affect my life in any way. But the truth is, THEY DO! Like anger, smokers are what they are for various reasons, a multitude actually. They THINK they look cool when they smoke, cause they're not thinking enough.


--Marilyn Whore-roe--

Again, they THINK smoking relieves stress, when medical science has proven otherwise.



Most importantly, they exist to piss the world off by fumigating(or so they THINK) air conditioned areas, or places where ventilation is a future concept yet to be discovered.



If you could kill mosquitoes and cockroaches with cigarettes, I would be slightly more tolerant. BUT u CAN'T, biatch! So please stop drowning the innocent people around by killing them faster than u kill yourself.

Classic Oldie...

anger management

Last time i heard, Adam Sandler was the protagonist. Even a quiet guy like Adam had to get pissed off eventually.

Anger comes in many forms, e.g mild, moderate and extreme. Getting angry is part of life,in fact, it's an integral part of life for some. Lets be honest, Alex Ferguson wouldn't be winning championships if he didn't blow his top everytime man u played like a bunch of nannies. So tell me, who doesn't get pissed off from time to time? u'd be lying if u told me 'i never get angry, ever!'. Whether it is the internal accumulation of livid sensations or external rage, it still is ANGER, so cut the crap and don't give me all that bollocks about not getting angry. The only difference is whether u show it, and how u show it, and that also happens to be the bottom line, remember that XD. So unless you're ever-forgiving saint, it is improbable to restrain the rising of blood temperatures and feeling the heart pounding in excitement. Fyi, it's also the moment when people experience the adrenaline rush.

Well, that's not the sole reason i'm blogging tonight. The paragraph above might seem as a justification of my actions, but NOOOO (imagine the longest 'no' u've ever heard), haha not this time! It all started when i went to play football with my buddies today. We were practising our corner kicks and finishing in front of goal, so one of us was given the duty to supply corner kicks for the other guys. We were having so much fun, then a ball was kicked out of bounds, i went to pick it up and crossed it for the guys. As i made my way back to the goal mouth, something hard struck me at the back, just below my neck sending me tumbling down to the ground, rolling around and writhing in pain. After i regained composure, I made my way to the 6 yard box again, without complaining whatsoever. That was till i found out that the thing that hit me wasn't a ball, it was some solid coconut-like fruit that hit me so hard and caused me so much misery. At the spurt of a moment, I felt uncontrollable infuriation and cursed the person who brought much pain onto me. I'm sure he didn't intend to strike me with it, but at that point in time, i felt that it was necessary to force upon him the concept that one should THINK before one does ridiculous stuff like crossing stuff like that. I wanted it to sink in into his brain, but i couldn't get myself to say it in an extremely diplomatic manner. well, that was the end of it. I didn't say more. Didn't have too. We played a match together after that and things are back to normal already. What can i say? a lesson learnt the hard way for him, and a cue to remind myself to be more polite while telling people off.

Rihanna

In case u haven't realised, the name rihanna is in no way synonymous with the words 'umbrella' and 'ella ella ella eh eh eh'. Still, what continues to strike me with fascination is the creativity in the lyrics of her songs. Note: i said creativity, not meaning. If you've heard the previous popular single, you'd get freakin' pissed off every time u see an umbrella. Damn i hate her. There was this point in time when the words 'ella ella ella eh eh eh' kept ringing in my head, so much so that faeces was no longer malodorous, the sky no longer high and bitter gourds no longer bitter- so intense was its impact that i couldn't eat sleep or shit peacefully. Well, after having endured protracted periods of insomnia, constipation and starvation(?), I'm delighted with her decision to release a new breathtaking hit single- Take a bow. Whiners out there, please don't complain, because this song will take your breath away, leaving you with no air like jordin sparks and chris brown. wow bad joke =X Apparently, the song's about this couple(heterosexual, of course), and the guy cheats on the girl, admits his mistake and begs for forgiveness, but the fairer sex thinks he's just staging a beautiful play(akin to playing hamlet XD) and being insincere about it, so she decides to applaud him, encourages him to take credit(by bowing) and then ditches him. -curtain falls-



- Rihanna Lyrics



Wow i love this song!

Futsal!

Omg yesterday's futsal game is beyond the description of words. Actually, the closest to description of awesomeness would be the word 'OWNING'. Futsal, in case u all didn't know, is very similar to street soccer, but it is played indoors and has an artificial pitch. We had just the right number of players and just the right mood to play, it was THE perfect game. So perfect was it that I had to wear long socks as a celebration of perfection. Lets see, there were 12 of us: nick niel siege dulun waihong cow chern wei cw's bro cw's other bro and cw's bro's friend. Yeap, that's all of us; the interesting part of it was that it really doesn't matter who people play with, so long as they're fair and clean.

Okay, enough with the sentimentality. Its bitching time! =D It all started like this: Cautious justin wanted to make sure that the courts weren't booked yesterday so he decided to call the futsal management and make a booking. Some receptionist who was courteous and sounded professional picked up the phone and assured him that his reservation had been confirmed. On Sunday morning, when they got to the place, the guy at the counter gave us the green light to play, so in they went. All of them exuded youth for the first 30min, and aged as they played on. Then came the killjoy in the form of the guy on duty. He told them that they had to leave because they didn't book the place. Wait! did he just accuse me of being an irresponsible organiser? Cause somehow justin vividly remember myself calling the management and being assured of a court for 2 hours. hm. So SUPPRESSED was his frustration that he lashed out at the the officer, slapped his once on each side of his face, kicked him in the arse and sent him running home crying for his momma. That was what you all wanted to hear right? Sadist bastards. Too bad that wasn't what really transpired on that day when the sun was so hot it fried my brain through the aluminium roof(speaking of global warming,!@#$%^&*()) This was what really happened: Justin tried to convince the officer that he did place a booking under his name. The officer was uncompromising, but suggested that they moved to another court. Initially, they were hesitant, but relented nonetheless. Justin and co. cursed the cruelty that plundered them but spoke no evil of the officer's skin color. Decent young lads they were=D Yea right! The best part was that the very man that pushed them around like punching bags was hoodwinked into believing that they only played for 2 hours =) SUCKER!

at the end of the game, my head was throbbing; heart, racing; and body, dying. We had aged beyond our years.

Note to all who played: thou shall get a refund

Anyway, here's a pic of me that a friend took while i was taking a shot in the field.

damn big damn mean damn green

Today was a green day for me, and its definitely not because i'm overly obsessed with the band as american idiots are, but because today is the premier of the green mean monster machine, *drum rolls- theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee hulk! Actually, i didn't have much say in the choice of movie, cause going with the flow is part of the show. As much as the previous sentence doesn't make sense, it is exactly what i am trying to convey. Movies nowadays make no sense of reality, because they are mainly based on surreality. Now, why the need for this avenue to escape from reality? Does it arise from the fact that the present is so daunting that it is no longer a gift? Or are we just in need of occasional respite from the dullness of life that we must channel our attention to fiction from which we derive peace of the mind? Haha, frankly, i don't know and don't care either!

But there's one thing i can tell about that movie, and that of MOST movies in recent times, it is a trait that they share in common, a deeply rooted tradition that has come out from nowhere, and that is that they all have lousy endings, nothing intriguing, much less anything appealing at all because they all have become so predictable. For instance, when the hulk emerged, we all know that there would be a worthy adversary that he would fight, or the whole bloody movie would become a documentary to be broadcasted on discovery channel. Well, the eventual outcome would be that good will triumph over evil, hence the predictability. However, if movie producers decided to be creative about endings, they'd be criticized as unfeeling and maybe even callous, followed by dismal ratings and poor turnout rate at the cinemas. Such is the requirement of today's movies that we can only blame ourselves for our shallowness. Ironic isn't it? No wonder Oscar Award winners are usually from movies NO ONE can possibly understand. Yet, despite all that is said, i have reserved a compliment for the movie i watched while freezing under the chilling air conditioner- the graphics were fantabulous. So...if u are a graphic addict and have second thoughts about watching the movie, i say, go for it!







Dear hardcore Greenday fans, i shall appease you all by paying tribute to one of their more popular songs- American Idiot. Lets have one minute of silence while reading the lyrics:

Don't wanna be an American idiot.
Don't want a nation under the new media.
And can you hear the sound of hysteria?
The subliminal mindfuck America.

Welcome to a new kind of tension.
All across the alien nation.
Everything isn't meant to be okay.
Television dreams of tomorrow.
We're not the ones who're meant to follow.
Well that's enough to argue.

Well maybe I'm the faggot America.
I'm not a part of a redneck agenda.
Now everybody do the propaganda.
And sing along in the age of paranoia.

Welcome to a new kind of tension.
All across the alien nation.
Everything isn't meant to be okay.
Television dreams of tomorrow.
We're not the ones who're meant to follow.
Well that's enough to argue.

Don't wanna be an American idiot.
One nation controlled by the media.
Information nation of hysteria.
It's going out to idiot America.

Welcome to a new kind of tension.
All across the alien nation.
Everything isn't meant to be okay.
Television dreams of tomorrow.
We're not the ones who're meant to follow.

Then again, forget it =)

Life of a DM

Make no mistake, because DM in this context in not in reference to the Defense Minister, but rather, the defensive midfielder in the game of football as coined by the british, 'soccer' by the yankees (monkeys or donkeys also can). I recently joined a football team here near my place, and made my debut last Saturday. I did reasonably well for a first timer, but there's still have plenty of room for improvement. Okay that's not the point, we were leading 3-1 at halftime, and then lost 4-3 at full time. U might say...'wtf!' But yes, it is true. We played against a team of guys 1-2 years younger, who wore expensive boots, dyed hair, wore ear studs to games and whose words were much more blasphemous than George Bush's famous 'Smoke 'em out'. After conducting some post-mortem with the my teammates, we came to the conclusion that we must have more training sessions. I wonder what use will it be of, if we do not have a constructive method of training. Other than that, we accused each other of things that we did, and things that we did not do. Typical of growing young men, who have lived on egotism like cotton wrought with iron, who accuse to excuse, who know less than they think they know, and more than they think they do not know. We must not be engulfed by immaturity, rather, let us grow as a team from strength to strength, and the come out to kick some...ass? or shud it be balls?

Same old story

I'm going to have to find alternative entertainment for myself already, because malaysian politics is all the same. We're going to have to witness similar tales of conspiracy, controversy and corruption( just like the 3Cs in Chen Cherng Chu). At first, i was enthralled by the pertinence that the articles i read exuded, but now, all the excitement is dwindling as I begin to find politics cloyingly sickening. Come on politicians, is that all the creativity u can muster?

Bizarre Headlines!

Yesterday's STAR paper had this little column on the front page titled 'police expects crime rate to increase in the klang valley'. I just had to read the title to feel my blood boiling within. Sure, most of the government related organisations are unaccountable, irresponsible and maybe incorrigible; but after so much effort put into reforming the police force, ie increased wages, replacement of inspector general(s), and government repeated pledges to curb the country's soaring crime rate, the least we could expect is for this bunch of goons to have the decency to carry out their responsibilities; and here they are, insisting that they have improved, because now they're forewarning us of the dangers to come, GREAT! So this is very telling of the plan they have in store for us citizens, which i expect nothing of, because by speculating that crime rate will rise, they are in fact encouraging crime. That also reflects the efficacy of our police force where national security is concerned. It would be absurd to claim to not know how to solve this problem. Simply putting more officers on patrol would ease the already heavy reliance on privately employed residential security. If, even I can think of such an idea, shouldn't the supposedly vigilant inspector general be able to come up with something more concrete instead of slacking in his hellhole everyday and ordering mamak food every 2-3 hours? They blame it on the recent fuel price hike, while i would hold them solely culpable, because it just shows that we've made no progress in terms of security despite pouring funds into training more dumb brains into useful people. They have no contingency plan, because they've been more concerned about filling their own wallets than working on building a clean, just and civil society(as publicized during the government's election campaign). NOOBS!

Unique, Eccentric or downright Weird?

I was surfing facebook as i usually do when i've nothing much to do. Since I have virtually nothing to do, signing in on facebook has become somewhat a regimented routine of my life. Well, i stumbled upon some photos of a friend(lets call the person A) with whom i once shared quite a fair bit in common. Not only was i appalled to the verge of puking, but also utterly disappointed that A remains a person i can no longer accept as a confidante. As i browsed through A's photos, I felt increasingly vindicated of my decision to not maintain cordial relations with him. Not that I'm someone of status, but i do have a choice over who i wish to mingle with. So here's the thing, the photos were obscene, vile, vulgar and in many ways, unnatural. Bearing in mind the fact that people are unique, i still fail to understand why A's choice in living life like this. Has A not realise that A's behavior has become a deterrent to many people who were close to him? Also, the people whom i see A with in the photos are those that he spoke ill of in the past, denouncing their morals, questioning their integrity and inwardly rejecting their friendship. Hm... it seems like there has been a strange quirk of fate. But i call it sheer hyprocrisy =)

The impossible love

I've seen a girl I cannot forget, I know her by name, but that's as close as I'll ever get. It's sad to say, we never could be, for she was far superior than me. Her beauty could move the sun, and it shines like stars that fill my heart, without impression nor intention on her part. So lovely, gracious and modest she was, like a pretty flower donning a hat. Her beauty flows beyond the surface of her skin, just as a great book is adorned with a fanciful decor. She remains the sun, while I the sea, and though we see each other daily, we shall never meet. We might have, could have, would have been, but all is said in deep regret.

Malaysia...truly Asia!

Such a flattering title could only signify a momentous occasion; ironically, it does not. With fuel prices rising as much as 40% over a day, there's little reason for cheers of joy. During the days leading up to the price hike, the media cautioned malaysians to be wary of the price hike that would soon ensue. In my opinion, the people should not be the ones placing too much concern over it, rather, the federal government should brace themselves for political upheaval that will be the culmination of protracted financial torment of the people. I find it unacceptable that the government's explanation for the price hike is that "It is not an attempt to be popular, we have to think in the best interests of the people". So, from the prime minister's explanation, it is assumed that we must accept that a price increase is for the betterment of the people, and that he and his cronies are 'trying their best' with the people's 'interest' in mind. Hm... certainly, things would have been different if they hadn't had besmirch their own credibility in the course of the last 5 years. We might even have trusted that such a price increase is justified. But I don't think any malaysian, whether young or old, dumb or intelligent and most importantly without regard of race, would be beguiled by their expedient rhetorics. Because no where in the increase from $1.92 to $2.70 per litre states that you scums are trying your best =) We're not stupid enough, just as you're not clever enough.

Contradiction, hypocrasy or expediency?

We all have in us the ying & yang. Some have it in equal measure, while others have a dominant component. It forms our conscience, governs our actions, and ultimately, reflects what kind of person we are. But are we to be judged based on what we do, or would it be more justified if we are judged based on our thoughts? There's actually no definite answer to such a conundrum, neither would i want to risk feigning wisdom that i obviously do not possess and try to conjure up something impressive that would seem like a plausible answer.

Pardon me if i'm making assumptions here, but i believe everyone of us has at least two sides which we tend to present to others, just as there are 2 sides to a coin. Yes, at least 2, some people are just so unpredictable that they might scream, yell and what not one minute, and try to be all nicey dicey the next. Under normal circumstances, we would categorized them mercilessly under the 'manipulative', 'unstable' or 'mentally unsound'. This immediate classification does no justice to the subject because it shows a lack of understanding of the nature of the subject itself. I'm sure the following sentence is extremely cliche, but i'll say it nonetheless. Everyone is different. Each individual's behavior has been moulded throughout the years and is a reflection of their family background. Hence, if we do not even attempt to comprehend their differences, we will never know why they are the way they are. In general paper, failure of doing so would be deemed as generalisation, knee-jerk reaction, jumping to conclusions etc. Yet, is it not what we always do?

For example, when i was in lower secondary, and had hormones raging within me for reasons that i could not explain, i was hot tempered, vile and somewhat violent. As a result, i always got into heated arguments with peers, which led to physical altercations on occasions that the person i was up against was gutsy enough to try and kick my butt. I was considered a bully, depicted as an intimidating character to juniors and my peers distant themselves away from me. I realised i could barely count the number of friends i had with the fingers on one hand, and it certainly was not because i had too many friends to count. So i seeked refuge by turning to my primary schoolmates. Still, nothing could compensate for the lack of companionship where i really was. Life was miserable, i had no aim in life, entangled in an ep3 i did not enjoy one bit and had to put up with people who were testing my patience with each passing day. After 2 years of this life, i couldn't take it anymore, so i decided to show the side of myself which only a few were familiar with. People around me were paranoid about the sudden change, but i assure u, they weren't half as paranoid as i was about them. Doubters of my character emerged one by one, frequently speaking ill of me. Voila! From a bully...i allegedly turned into a two faced monster. It took me a great deal of time to reverse that image, just to gain acceptance among my friends. Since then, i've made no mistake about judging people prematurely, because i've been through a grueling experience myself. Lets put it this way, maybe communication is not as straightforward as some might think, because what is thought might not be said, and what said not been through thought-thats where contradictions come into play. Never judge a book by its cover, because pretty books might not be good; likewise, an ugly looking book might just be the masterpiece of the century. Sadly, actions usually command a higher value when one's personality is placed under scrutiny. This very flaw is what makes man so unpredictable and as i would put it, intricate beings.

With all that said, lets not discount the fact the there are indeed people who are out to get the better of others for self interest. Confucius say 'he who is not a man might not be a woman'. Ok scratch that. But i think there's some saying about having to climb on others if one cannot climb faster than others. That kind of action is one that is despicable and expedient. I know people who would consider these kind of people streetwise, smart and even shrewd. Thankfully, 'what goes around goes around goes around comes all the way back around'. Ill gotten gains are not sustainable. Just look at Genting Group. =) Let nature take its course.

P.S they say a man's biggest flaw is insensitivity, yet those who are sensitive are always teased about being feminine, what's with all the contradictions anw! =/ Make no mistake(quoted from cy's blog), i hate two kinds of people: Gays and...., eh i think only one larh =D

Check this out...U won't regret!!!

Cinderella by Steven Curtis Chapman

She spins and she sways to whatever song plays,
Without a care in the world.
And I'm sittin' here wearin' the weight of the world on my shoulders.
It's been a long day and there's still work to do,
She's pulling at me saying "Dad I need you!
There's a ball at the castle and I've been invited and I need to practice my dancin'"
"Oh please, daddy, please!"

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Oh I will dance with Cinderella
I don't wanna miss even one song,
Cuz all to soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone

She says he's a nice guy and I'd be impressed
She wants to know if I'd approve of a dress
She says "Dad, the prom is just one week away,
And I need to practice my dancin'"
"Oh please, daddy, please!"

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Ohh-oh ohh-oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't wanna miss even one song,
Cuz all to soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone
She will be gone.

Well, she came home today
With a ring on her hand
Just glowin' and tellin' us all they had planned
She says "Dad, the wedding's due six months away
And I need to practice my dancin'"
"Oh please, daddy please!"

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Ohh-oh ohh-oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't wanna miss even one song,
(even one song)
Cuz all to soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone

The distinction of humanity: Race

Nowadays, it's hard not to be able to discern people who are of a different skin tone as ourselves and perceive them as outsiders, intruders or even worse, adversaries. In Malaysia, race has dominated the political scene even before independence. More often than not, political interests are motivated by expedient politicians who preach racial harmony but practise racial dichotomy. It is disheartening to know that even several years after the golden jubilee of independence, we have not moved forward as a united front, but rather a hodgepodge of divisive entities. This is not what the father of the nation- Tunku Abdul Rahman- had had in mind when he and several other leaders successfully brought independence to the country. Indeed, it would be naive of him to believe in perpetuating peace in Malaysia, especially with exclusive privileges allocated to a certain race, for he and others did not foresee that their successors would carry out such flagrant abuse of power. Now, I'm in no way insinuating that the aforementioned race does not deserve or that the privileges have been granted unfairly. Conversely, I believe that the founding fathers of malaysia would have had the best interest of its people in mind, only to be betrayed and thrown into political abyss by the very people that they nurtured in the political scene. More importantly, the issue of special privileges has been the point of contention and tension of many issues.

The keris has been wielded several times at the UMNO general meeting by prominent leader who claim to be the voice and protector of their people. Brain drain has become increasing rampant in the country because top scorers of the other races have been denied scholarships by the government on the basis of their ethnic groups. Political leaders rally for support on the basis that special rights will be removed if the opposition alliance takes over the government. When i took a cab from home to sunway, the malay driver repeatedly told me that the chinese and indians should not question the malay privileges. Only recently, the retired Dr. M made a speech in Johor, rallying support in his bid to force the incumbent prime minister to resign. What's more incredulous would be the content of his speech, which stated unambiguously that the 'domination of malays shall vanquish if nothing is to be done to overthrow the incumbent.' Also, part of his speech entailed the non-exclusive races losing respect for malays and even climbing all over their heads(metaphorically speaking of course). His hypocrasy aside, we can infer that the race card has now evolved into a political trump card- an ace of spades as i would call it. A caucasian permanent resident once remarked 'M'sia is the most racist country i've been to. Race is relevant from the political sphere to filling up forms which usually have a section on race, which reads 'Malay, Chinese, Indian, Others'. It is utterly disappointing that view, judge, treat and discriminate people because of their skin color and not because of the virtues that they possess. We have failed as a nation because we cannot seem to proceed without racial issues being continuously raised for self interest. Some fail to look beyond race to achieve greater good, others merely seek to extend tensions that have been built up surreptiously all these while, most of which wish to ignore the ever-widening chasm between races. Sure, we might have achieved steady economic growth throughout the years, so some might argue that status quo should be retained. But, what eludes these exponents of democracy is the fact we could have progressed much further than where we currently stand IF the goverment had practiced a just and efficient system. Yes, i said efficient system(of governance): public transport is haphazardly operated(maybe because proton can't sell its cars anywhere else other than here and wtf our monorail system is KL should be named 'Minirail' instead because it can only carry around 100 people), government departments move at snail pace, roads aren't properly maintained, allegations of corruption are endemic, government linked companies only hire based on skin color etc. I would get sick enumerating everything.

Likewise, America, touted as one of the most democratic nation, is currently having to accept that racism is still prevalent in its society, especially during the run in of the democratic party's presidential candidate selection. The two survivors of the democratic campaign are pioneers in their own way. One is a female candidate, the other a black male candidate, both of whom are to be the first of their kind IF eventually elected as president. I would like to highlight the turmoil caused by snippets of racial sermons that have been preached in pulpits of churches, because these are telling evidence of the remnants of slavery practiced by the people of a country which claim to be the most liberal of all. Many voters can yet accept a president of a previously enslaved race, and they cite none other than his skin color as a reason to not vote for him, despite his efforts in bringing together differences that once set the people apart. Why? Because they have been stricken with myopia that prevents them from looking beyond skin color, as is the case in our country. Liberal, the U.S might be, free of racism, it definitely is not.

Cynics will disagree that much can be done about the current state of matters, but it is precisely this kind of attitude that will impede any kind of progress that we hope to achieve, be it now or in the future. Prescience, i might not possess, but it does not take a genius to predict what the future holds for our truly asian homeland.

the beginning of an end

Hello All! This blog was created for the purpose of sharing revelations, insights(dumb as they might be), experience, tasteful jokes(which might not appeal to all) as well as to gain enlightenment. Yea right. But i digress. I hope the fanciful name of this blog won't deter people from paying my recorded posts an occasional visit=) This isn't exactly my first public blog, just that previous blogs have now turned obsolete because it was 3/4/5 years ago that i last updated the blog. Back then, i couldn't speeeek nor speell properly(not that much has improved). BUT... now that my faith has been replenished, I shall put an end to stagnation and begin blogging.

disclaimer: the content of this blog should be read with an open mind. Still...that's your prerogative. happy reading!